So you're monogamous-ish and curious? Welcome to the wild, wonderful world of ethical non-monogamy! It's not just about adding more people to your love life; it's about expanding your understanding of connection, trust, and self-discovery.

Understanding non-monogamy

Non-monogamy isn't a one-size-fits-all concept. It's a spectrum of relationship styles that prioritize openness, consent, and communication. Let's break down some of the most common types:

• Open relationships: you, me, and maybe a hot barista: Partners agree that they can engage in sexual activities with others, often with specific boundaries in place.
• Polyamory: all the feelings, all the calendars: Involves having multiple romantic relationships simultaneously, with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved.
• Swinging: social + sexual. Party on: Typically involves committed couples engaging in sexual activities with other couples or individuals, often in a social setting.
• Relationship anarchy: no rules, just vibes: Rejects traditional relationship hierarchies, allowing individuals to form connections based on mutual agreement without predefined labels.
• Monogamish: mostly monogamous, with occasional spice: Coined by columnist Dan Savage, this term describes couples who are mostly monogamous but allow for occasional sexual experiences outside the relationship.

Each style has its own set of dynamics, and what's essential is finding what aligns with your values and boundaries.

Navigating jealousy

Ah, jealousy, the green-eyed monster that doesn't discriminate between monogamous and non-monogamous relationships. The key isn't to eliminate jealousy but to understand and manage it.

• Self-reflection and knowing your triggers: identify the root causes of your jealousy. Is it fear of abandonment, insecurity, or something else?
• Open communication: discuss your feelings with your partner(s) without blame. Use "I" statements to express your emotions.
• Establish boundaries: set clear agreements that make everyone feel secure and respected.
• Seek support: consider therapists who get ENM exist or joining support groups where you can share experiences and coping strategies.

Remember, jealousy is a natural emotion. It's how you handle it that makes the difference.

Finding your community

Embarking on a non-monogamous journey can feel isolating if you don't know where to look. Fortunately, there are numerous platforms and communities to connect with like-minded individuals:

• Feeld: a dating app designed for open-minded singles and couples exploring ethical non-monogamy.
• OkCupid: offers detailed profile options to indicate non-monogamous preferences, making it easier to find compatible matches.
• #Open: a community-driven app that caters specifically to ethically non-monogamous individuals.
• Local Meetups and events: search for polyamory or non-monogamy groups in your area. These gatherings can provide support, education, and friendship.

Building a network can provide not only potential partners but also a support system to navigate the complexities of non-monogamous relationships.

Embracing the journey

Non-monogamy isn't about fixing a broken relationship or spicing things up temporarily. It's a conscious choice to explore love and connection beyond societal norms. It requires honesty, vulnerability, and a willingness to grow.

As you venture into this new territory, remember that mistakes will happen, feelings will be intense, and growth is inevitable. Embrace the journey with an open heart and mind.

Discover Art that gets you

At OhPosies, we celebrate the beautiful chaos of non-normative love. Our bold, inclusive, and unapologetically non-monogamous art prints and products are designed to resonate with your unique journey. Whether you're queer, neurodivergent, sex-positive, or all of the above, we've got something that speaks to you.

FAQs

Q: Is this just a phase or are we broken?
A: Nope and nope. You're just evolving. Monogamy isn’t mandatory.

Q: Is non-monogamy right for every couple?
A: Not necessarily. It requires a strong foundation of trust, communication, and mutual desire to explore.

Q: Can we still be committed?
A: Commitment ≠ exclusivity. Think loyalty, not lockdown.

Q: How do we start the conversation about non-monogamy?
A: Approach the topic with curiosity and openness. Share your thoughts and listen actively to your partner's feelings.

Q: What if one of us is more interested in non-monogamy?
A: It's crucial to move at the pace of the less enthusiastic partner. Consent and comfort are paramount.

Q: What if we screw it all up?
A: Honestly? You probably will mess up at some point. And that’s okay. Mistakes are part of the deal when you’re unlearning societal scripts and figuring out what actually works for you. The beauty of non-monogamy is that it’s flexible, personal, and a whole lot more forgiving than most Instagram relationships. Learn, adjust, laugh through the awkward bits and keep going!

Final thoughts

Exploring non-monogamy is a bold step toward understanding the multifaceted nature of love and connection. It's not about following a trend; it's about discovering what truly resonates with you and your partner(s). So, take a deep breath, communicate openly, and embrace the adventure ahead!